Practical Righteousness

I grew up going to church and even went to a Christian school for three years.  In school, I was taught that salvation depended upon belief in Jesus, and that if one believed, one loved Jesus enough to obey Him.  Because I had a fear of hell, I would try to do good works to prove that I loved Jesus, therefore believing in Him; therefore being saved.  This meant that I was trying to prove my salvation by my works, and so it wasn't real.

More than anything in life, I wanted it to be real -- I have this deathly fear of being a hypocrite.  I truly wanted to do the good works out of love for Jesus -- but I never felt that love.  In fact, I felt a lot of resentment because why would He continually try to "make" me do what I couldn't seem to do?  Everybody around me thought I was "good" -- the word "goody two-shoes" comes to mind, and there has never been one more deserving of the title.  I HATED myself and my cold, cold heart.

Added to this, I became addicted to, what in polite conversation, amounts to pornographic thoughts at the ripe old age of twelve.  Now, these DEFINITELY did not "fit" with being a Christian!!  I went to church regularly since I was twelve; I even spent several years teaching Sunday school during the day, and having these thoughts at night!!  I even taught transformation as a Christian; the fact that we are new creatures in Christ, the old has passed away -- but why had not my "old things" passed away?  The passage does not refer to the old man; unfortunately the old man (flesh) plagues us until the day we die, but it refers to "old THINGS" -- the worldly lifestyle we were to have no love for anymore.  We should DEFINITELY not love our old lifestyle more than God!!  If that is the case, are we really saved?

I "repented" of my thoughts  all of the time, but it would only last a day or two.  Yet I would read:  "No one, having put his hand to the plow, and looking back, is fit for the kingdom of God." (Luke 9:62).  The context is in being a disciple of Jesus, and the idea is that one can not be saved and not be a disciple -- it is all or nothing, and once the decision is made, there is no looking back to the "old man" or we are not fit for the kingdom of heaven.  I've made it clear that I do not believe that we become sinless once we are saved, but neither do we LOVE the sin we are doing as I did.  We do not LIVE with it.

I looked at it this way.  I was praying for the Holy Spirit to cleanse and transform me of this sin, but then I didn't listen to what He was telling me.  If the means He used was, "No one who does this is fit for the kingdom of God" and THAT didn't stop me, what could He try next?  I knew I should not defend the right to be worldly -- how does that witness for God to others when they see NO difference in me at all?  In fact, I, even I, did not see a difference in me.  I wasn't living up to anything the Bible said a Christian was supposed to be!!

I wasn't loving.  I hated to worship God -- how many times do I have to THANK Him, I wondered.  I did not have the mind of Christ and didn't really understand what the Bible meant a lot of times.  I was not more than a conqueror through Christ.

It all boiled down to this.  If I was asking for the Holy Spirit's help, then why wasn't I letting Him help me.  Elijah told the worshipers of Baal (and after all, I was worshiping these thoughts, placing them higher than God, being unwilling to really give them up):  "How long will you hesitate between two opinions?  If Yahweh is God, follow Him.  But if Baal, follow him." (1 Kings 18:21).  God showed me this passage, and it was do or die.  What else can God do?  Hebrews 10:26-31 tells us that if we reject what the Spirit is trying to do, then there is nothing else He can do to save us.  By now, I KNEW I wasn't truly saved.  I had tasted a LOT of the Spirit, but I had never trusted Him.  I had never really put my heartfelt faith in Christ.  I gave Him intellectual assent, but never tried Him.

What James means when he says that faith without works is dead is that others will know we truly believe what we say ONLY if we act on it.  Until then, it's just words!!  That is true of anything in life.  We suddenly make it complicated when it comes to spiritual things, and try to find our way around that verse, but how many times, and in how many ways have you heard, "The proof is in the pudding" or "Put your money where your mouth is."  People say that to act on spiritual faith is adding works to faith, but in life, we look for those who live out their beliefs and principles!!  We call them people of integrity who really mean what they say.  Why don't we do that when it comes to Christianity?

If I was to be "more than a conqueror" in Christ, I had to be "in Christ."  And that comes by believing His death and resurrection. I stated my belief in Him.  THEN, the Bible says that God imputes His righteousness to us -- makes us righteous, and that He works in us both to will and to do for His good purpose (Phil. 2:13).  This means that I cannot beat these thoughts in my flesh (I'd tried for 36 years), but "in Him" I could.  God's marching orders for me was this:

Let us walk with decency  (in the Spirit), as in the daylight; not in carousing and drunkenness, not in sexual impurity and promiscuity, not in quarreling and jealousy.  But put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no plans to satisfy the fleshly desires." (Romans 13:13-14).


Whenever a thought would come, I would take it captive and turn it over to Jesus Christ (2 Corinthians 10:5), and I would picture myself putting on Christ, like sort of a garment.  Then I would think about something else, often times God.  I wouldn't study "self-help" stuff so much as about God, or doctrines, or whatever -- the idea was to cast it to Jesus and move on.  "Self-help" stuff keeps it fresh and lingering, and if I already know what to do, rather than STUDYING it, I just need to DO it!!  That was five years ago, and I've not lingered over any of those thoughts since that time -- I still cast them Jesus' way, though they come much less often, and with much less intensity now.  But, it worked to accept Christ, and to obey these marching orders, and God has given me the victory -- only "in Christ".  I have tried that with each new stumbling block that comes along.  It is how to live practically in Christ.

Often we know what to do, it is just a matter of doing it.  But we don't do it to prove our salvation, or out of fear of losing our salvation, but because the Spirit lives in us, and we made a decision when we are saved to let Him transform us.  Yes, we are sinners, and yes God counts us as not being sinners now.  But, if we are not trying to become what God sees in us -- if it is not important to us -- that is not in keeping with having the Holy Spirit in us.  Everybody visits the old flesh -- but to live there, with no thought or concern about living the new life God has given us, to defend the right to sin, or proudly walk in it -- how is that in keeping with God in us?

Yet, the solution is not to try on our own.  If God gives us marching orders, we obey, trusting in His strength and victory to win the day -- never, EVER trusting in ourselves.  That is how we live out the righteousness that God gives us, and we thank God that He sees us as righteous already!!